Justin's Bachelor Party-02/2008

Names have been changed to protect the innocent, okay, not really. I don't care that much and lets face reality, no one that I hang around is "innocent", ever. At least not in the bachelor party context. One important point about this whole debacle, we picked the coldest weekend of the year.
We're talking bone-chilling, single digit night-time temperatures. Not to mention that the shack is about as high as you get above sea level in the Ozark Mountains. Not for the feint of heart, family friend JR actually thought we would all freeze to death.
Ha ha, what a sissy!

This picture pretty much sums up the scene as it was when I arrived. Miscellaneous piles of dead brush stacked everywhere. Thankfully, I had Nelson with me to help clear all this crap.



Quick picture of the "shack" and my old truck. I kind of miss that truck and it definitely was a nice looking vehicle.



Nelson and I cleared all the above brush, gathered a ton of rocks for a fire pit, and collected and stacked a manly pile of fire wood. The results of our hairy chest labor can be seen below. The fire pit has two cooking areas and a large open space for a decent bonfire. The rock wall supporting the rear structure is about three feet tall and two feet wide at the base. You could cook a whole cow on the thing if you were so inclined. Nelson and the fire pit:

Update: So, my Dad decided to rebuild the fire pit and needless to say he made mine and Nelson's attempt look like it was built by Corky on a Mt. Dew binge. And somehow a 61 year-old man can lift and move rocks that would give me prolapsed rectum. Ha ha, gross! But it's no surprise that Dad's back goes out all the time.

Pile of wood. My wood.



Major kudos to Nelson for toting a pony keg of Diamond Bear all the way from Little Rock. That pretty much made all the work worth it.

So, what else did we do that weekend? I'm glad you asked:

Beer: Justin going after the Diamond Bear


Spades:

A note on spades. David and I went on an epic run and owned the entire room finishing the weekend undefeated. Including a come from behind win where we were down 300+ points. Later, David got so drunk he took his socks off before he went to sleep and then nearly got frostbite on his toes. I'd say it was a win overall.



Cribbage:

This was a beautiful end to a game. I can't remember who was on my team but I know we pegged out to win and left the losers in the stink hole. They had first count.



A bunch of Justin's friends showed up to support him handing his man-card off to his future wife. Hazen, Nathan, Jones, Eli. Notice the two people drinking Busch, one is an engineer and one is a chiropractor. I guess a dollar doesn't go as far as it used to. My dog seems interested although he's more of a bourbon drinker.



I don't remember what the question was but the answer is two, apparently. Thanks Pat, ya drunk baasstad! Also, good work on donating the smoker. Hee hee hee.



mmmmmmmmmm, beans. They were still in the same skillet 24 hours later and still delicious. Now, I'd like to point out the cast iron stove. That wasn't there until Dad, Nelson, and I busted ass to get it put in and run the vent pipe out and over the shack. We didn't have the correct tools to cut the pipe, we had some tin snips which worked, kinda. So, we weren't sure that we had a good enough seal on the inside of the shack and thought we might all die of carbon monoxide poisoning during the night. However, once we got a fire started there seemed to be a pretty good draw pulling the smoke out. I admit I was a little nervous and actually slept as far away from the stove as possible the first night. Also, cast iron stoves need to cure and smell pretty bad when doing so. Guess we should have known that. Anyway, the stovepipe was still standing as of last week surviving multiple severe thunderstorms and pretty intense straight line winds, held up by a partially buried 4X4, tied to a tree and counter weighted with cinder blocks on the roof.



Did I mention it was cold? Dad always turns up in the best pictures. I'll have to post the "f*** you tourists" one if I can find it.



Uncle Rico was there. I'm pretty sure he could throw a football over those mountains. Actually, I think this is our neighbor's deer stand. I'm only guessing but there was a feeder on the other side of the field.



There was, of course, tons of hilarity I didn't include here because it's already long enough. Just to keep them in my memory I'm going to list a couple things:

1. Pork tenderloin =/= beef tenderloin.
2. Smoking meat in 10 degree weather is hard when morons keep opening the firebox.
3. David taught us all the importance of family and looking out for one another.
4. The Marshall Tucker Band may be the greatest group of musicians ever assembled.
5. Socks are a fickle companion and may desert you at any time.